I am writing this post as I want my children to know that it was not easy being a mother.
Don't get me wrong being a mom is the purest joy of my life. But after my 2nd pregnancy I went through hell internal and external.
2nd pregnancy was very difficult with a added Auto immune as a bonus. Once the delivery happened, there were wonderful in law fights and hell. Of course fights with the husband. Own family members breaking my heart. The most happiest time in my life turned nightmare-ish. Work sucked (lost direct reports in the mere fact that i was a returning mom to work) Had to pretty much quit my job. Earned planter factious, hip pain, shoulder pain. Had to leave my beautiful home due to many fights fights fights... Made a decision to stay as family for the sake of children. Move across the coasts to restart life. New jobs (2 already) to try to fit in and contribute.... Absolutely unfullfuilling job ever.
Some where along the way postpartum depression turned into "Adjustment Disorder" I guess this is what my shrink calls it. Having difficultly to cope with current life itself. Depressive moods. Lack of interest. Anxiety. Lost energy in the core. Absolutely zero career satisfaction. Aboslutely zero relationship satisfaction. Zero interest in the materialistic life. Sadness.
Through out all this I am still your best mom. You are still the best thing that happened to me. This part of my life is fully fulfilled. Its weird how two stories can coexist within me at the same time.
I am writing this to you because i want you to know, that it was VERY hard for your mom. You are 7 and 3... you have bestest happiest life. I am making sure of it while I am going through this.
Did I mention to you guys that there is the corona virus going around this time around the world and we are quarantined for 2 weeks now and possibly even more. So the world is also a bit of sad right now.
Here is a question Mahi you are asking me right now: What kind of star wears sun glasses? - Answer: a movie star of course! Krish you are sitting right next to me leaning in watching TV.
Don't get me wrong being a mom is the purest joy of my life. But after my 2nd pregnancy I went through hell internal and external.
2nd pregnancy was very difficult with a added Auto immune as a bonus. Once the delivery happened, there were wonderful in law fights and hell. Of course fights with the husband. Own family members breaking my heart. The most happiest time in my life turned nightmare-ish. Work sucked (lost direct reports in the mere fact that i was a returning mom to work) Had to pretty much quit my job. Earned planter factious, hip pain, shoulder pain. Had to leave my beautiful home due to many fights fights fights... Made a decision to stay as family for the sake of children. Move across the coasts to restart life. New jobs (2 already) to try to fit in and contribute.... Absolutely unfullfuilling job ever.
Some where along the way postpartum depression turned into "Adjustment Disorder" I guess this is what my shrink calls it. Having difficultly to cope with current life itself. Depressive moods. Lack of interest. Anxiety. Lost energy in the core. Absolutely zero career satisfaction. Aboslutely zero relationship satisfaction. Zero interest in the materialistic life. Sadness.
Through out all this I am still your best mom. You are still the best thing that happened to me. This part of my life is fully fulfilled. Its weird how two stories can coexist within me at the same time.
I am writing this to you because i want you to know, that it was VERY hard for your mom. You are 7 and 3... you have bestest happiest life. I am making sure of it while I am going through this.
Did I mention to you guys that there is the corona virus going around this time around the world and we are quarantined for 2 weeks now and possibly even more. So the world is also a bit of sad right now.
Here is a question Mahi you are asking me right now: What kind of star wears sun glasses? - Answer: a movie star of course! Krish you are sitting right next to me leaning in watching TV.
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