Friday, June 12, 2026

Expansion or Stewardship

 I am taking a break from work and I am reading, watching and enjoying this time of break.  My most favorite thing to think about:

1. How the Universe got created and what we know so far

2. Life and Evolution and especially Human Evolution

3.  The Bhagavat Gita

Today I came to a conclusion on Home Sapiens and their transition from Animal Kingdom to where we are now.   How this happened for 300,000+ years and many many generations of innovation to bring us to where we are now.  I reached an epiphany today that even though we have so many fancy tools now (AI, telescope etc) human nature hasn't changed much!

To understand what I am talking about let's first list the human time line into different eras. I took some AI help here to get my dates right:

  • Coexistence with Other Human Species (Before 40,000 Years Ago) - Homo sapiens live alongside other intelligent human species like Neanderthals and Denisovans. Instead of "taming" or enslaving them, we interact as cognitive equals, competing for resources, sharing cultural tools, and interbreeding—leaving a permanent genetic signature in modern human DNA.
  • The Agricultural Revolution (10,000 – 8000 BCE) - Humans begin transitioning from nomadic hunter-gatherer bands to settled farming communities. With farming comes enslaving and taming animals. Eventually we also enslave humans.
  • Early Vedic Period in India (1500 – 1000 BCE) - The varna system emerges in India as a flexible division of labor based on an individual's skills and actions (karma), not birth. During this early phase, the Shudra (laborer/artisan) class is an integrated and respected part of the social and spiritual community.
  • The Rise of Written Laws and Slavery (3000 – 1750 BCE) - In Mesopotamia, the invention of cuneiform writing provides the first written records of chattel slavery. By 1750 BCE, the Code of Hammurabi codifies slavery into law, regulating debt slavery, runaways, and treating human beings as legal property.
  • Consolidation of the Caste System (600 BCE – 400 CE) - The social hierarchy hardens into a rigid, hereditary genetic trap as texts like the Manusmriti ban inter-caste marriage. The concept of "ritual pollution" creates a deeply oppressive system of total social exclusion, forming the parallel marginalized class known today as Dalits. This is recorded in our DNA! Indians stopped mixing
  • Slavery Movement across the world especially Americas (100 BCE – 1700 CE) - Cruel practices of slavery take over the world. Child born to an enslaved woman inherits her status as slave property. A dark phase for humanity where exploitation takes a dark turn. When European empires expanded into the Americas and the world, they brought an extreme philosophy of resource extraction. Nature was viewed as an inert commodity to be conquered, mined, and deforested for profit. Other humans in different races were thought of as human assets to be exploited

  • The Democratic Movement (500 – 1900 CE) - In response to the oppression with Slavery and the caste system there have been many abolishments. Democracy being born and Woman's rights and many civilizations fight to free people and treat people with empathy

  • The Industrial and Fossil Fuel Revolution (Late 1700s – Present) - Humanity unlocks ancient, stored solar energy via coal, oil, and gas. By replacing biological muscles with machine power, fossil fuels break the ancient economic necessity of human bondage, generating the global wealth, mass education, and leisure time required to expand the human moral compass.

  • The Modern Green Energy Transition 21st Century (Present Day) - Armed with a modern moral and scientific consensus, humanity recognizes that exploiting the biosphere through carbon emissions threatens our survival. We are currently navigating the largest infrastructure overhaul in history, attempting to power civilization through sustainable, renewable energy without exploiting the planet or each other.


Did Slavery and Oppression end because of Fossil fuels? Has our history been only about oppression others for our own expansion. We went from human muscle energy to fossil fuel energy. We started to oppress animals while domesticating them. This followed by Human oppression. We also had gender oppression, for a way to control the reproduction of females. Keep them oppressed so we can make more children similar to the existing mentality. We transfered our oppression from human beings to fossil fuels! We are destroying our own planet! This put me in a terrible mood. Are homo sapiens a lost cause! Is it about controlling to expand? Is it about a hierarchical structure of power dominance? Aren't we a species that has empathy! Is it even real that we can show compassion to one another and the planet.

As I loose hope I am reminded of some good people who existed thought out the history and who exist now who question why we need to expand:
  • Thinkers like The Buddha who walked away from kingdoms and wealth. They explicitly taught Ahimsa (absolute non-violence to all living beings) and radical minimalism. They argued that chasing endless desire and consumption was the root of all human suffering.
  • Many Aztec and Indian tribes co-existed with the environment and they values harmony
  • Various Freedom fighters who worked tirelessly to free other humans from Monarchy, abolished slavery, brought equal rights to woman.
  • Our current environmentalists who are fighting to consume less fossli fuels and go green. Various minimalists who want to consume less
In one way we have homo sapiens who follow expansionism (maximizing energy exploitation for growth) and we have homo sapiens who follow stewardship (consuming less to maintain balance).


There are still pockets of oppression in the world. Pocket is still under-stating it. There is significant oppression in the world. Woman loosing rights! Caste system in India even though it is illegal. The expansion mind-set is causing us to loose our place in the planet. But there is human spirit to fight the hierarchical mindset and expansionism and to work together with harmony. Is this sprit enough?

This brings me to a conclusion, both forces have been part of human evolution:

  • The Expansion Impulse is driven by our survival instinct. It is our creativity, our tool-making, our science, and our restless desire to explore the unknown. Without expansion, we would never have developed modern medicine to cure diseases, transport to connect distant cultures, or the agricultural surplus that allows you and me to sit across a digital interface and have this deep philosophical conversation. This philosophy came with a consequence, the consequence was exploiting the animal kingdom, humans who are not like us and Earth itself.

  • The Stewardship Impulse is driven by our unique capacity for empathy and foresight. Humans are the only species that can look centuries into the future and realize that today's actions will hurt tomorrow's children. It is our capacity for guilt, restraint, and love for things that cannot give us immediate utility—whether that is an ancient forest, a captive animal, or a marginalized human being. We have evolved from just looking at our tribe to accepting differences in different genders, races and countries to live harmoniously.


On a good day I have hope for my kids and grand kids and future generation. On a bad day, I do not. We have made a mess. The animal kingdom still suffers with our oppression. We are hurting one another in the name of Caste, Race, Gender etc. We have caused massive extinctions and climate change with burning fossil fuels. Will human beings ever reach divinity and live in harmony with nature, one another and the animals that are not as powerful as us. Would we ever use our intelligence to truly steward the planet and work along with nature and one another? Is there hope?

As I think about this, I am thinking about what does Krishna say about this? I mainly think of the Bhagavat Gita and his teachings:
  •  In the Gita, he warns that chasing endless desire (kama) and hoarding resources destroys the human mind and society.
  • Krishna argues that if good, empathetic people walk away from their duties out of a desire to keep their own hands clean, they leave the levers of power entirely in the hands of tyrants and exploiters.
  • Krishna’s ultimate solution to the human energy is Nishkama Karma: fulfilling your worldly duties with maximum energy, excellence, and dedication, but with zero attachment to the personal fruits of your labor
  • He would encourage us to work furiously to build a clean energy infrastructure and clean up the planet without any desire for ourselves - Karma Yoga
  • But he would demand we be responsible caretakers of the planet (Stewardship) taking care of the planet and it's beings. - Bhakti Yoga


As I sit at home on my career break and reading many books and expanding my thoughts. Isn't it enough that I had expanded my life so far! I worked hard for my own benefit for my own family. Isn't it time to do something for others? Isn't it time to invoke stewardship in me to care for others and for the planet? Coming back to my epiphany,  we have all these fancy tools (AI) but it comes down to our animal nature of expanding or divine nature of empathy - to steward the planet.  I don't know what humanity will choose and what the end will be like?  But I am reminded of the fact that the only thing we can change is ourselves and no one else.  










Friday, May 29, 2020

Friday, May 15, 2020

My Top 5 Telugu Movies

My Favorite Telugu movies that I am watching during Covid-19 lockdown.  This is my all time top 5 list:

5. Yamadonga -  Post weight loss, Jr NTR brought it to the screen.  The combination of Rajmouli and NTR.  It was just a blast from the past kind of movie. One of the first epics (pouranikas) brought back to life that I enjoyed after a long time.  And jr NTR lived the role.  Never before or after have I seen a movie of him that I liked so much. Also for the first and probably only time I liked Mohan Babu

Big Thief (2007) - IMDb

4. Mahanati: Definitely there are flaws in the movie. Not a 100% accuracy of Savitri's life but the execution of the story and the sets just take me back to an era.  Probably in my previous life I was a fan of her.  I probably watched the movie at least 10+ times.

After Gemini Ganesan's family slammed Mahanati, Savitri's daughter ...

3. Manam - Something about seeing love that is not romantic in the screen that appeals to me.  ANR lives on.  Mother-son love that transcends time.  It is one of my go to movies.

Manam Soundtrack Album Disc Cover.jpg

2. Oh! Baby - Humm just realized its 3rd Samantha movie.  But in this she is the main star.  It is about mother's love.  A mother's sacrifice.  Each time I see this movie it touches my heart.  I was debating if this should be my first.  My fav dialogue:  "Na koduku na tho lenappudu zeevitham entha bagunte enti ippudu"

Oh! Baby Review {3.5/5}: An enjoyable ride

1. Maya Bazaar:  I just can't describe this movie.  Best movie of the century.  All time actually.  I don't think I want to say more. I watched it 100 times.  

Maya bazaar

Sunday, April 12, 2020

Kissed!!!!


Got kissed by a Dolphin!!!!!!


Looks like i never published it.  This happened 10 years ago.  Post covid19 i would never do this again

Sunday, April 5, 2020

Stuck at home with beautiful rain


Beautiful california.  
Let it rain let it rain.  
Let the earth heal while we are inside.  
Loving the warmth of family health and wealth.  
Feeling blessed an praying for the rest.
Beautiful california.
Let it rain let it rain

Friday, March 27, 2020

Corona

World is in a Pandemic!

Corona Covid-19 a new noval virus.  Noval virus means it has never been hosted by a human body.  The news is that it started in some market in China or maybe lab.  The world is suffering.

Let me correct it,  the Mother Earth is flourishing as we humans are being forced to go indoor and put in our place.  Animals and fish are coming out enjoying their world.  The Earth that belongs to them. 

The only suffering is humans!  Yes I don't want to make this a spiritual bla bla.  The health care providers, the suppliers, politicians and many ppl are working hard to save lives.  I can't be sitting at home quarantined, unaffected and talking about this so impersonally.

Yes I understand the seriousness of whats going on with the world and humans.  What I want to say is that I am not 'annoyed' that i have to stay home during this crisis.  I am not upset that the economy is in standstill.  It will recover unlike the lives lost.  Yes there is temporary suffering but its not permanent. 

Also this disease is effecting older and weaker community.  You might say survival of the fittest and let it spread, worst case it will bring the population count down.  But that's an impersonal way to look at it.  What if that is your family member that is the one number that is bringing the population count down.  Are you prepared to accept the pandemic then?  This is how Dharma works.  Is it the right for me or right for the human kind or right for the world.  What is the right thing to do? 

Either way how i feel about this, it is happening all around the world now.  How little control do i have in this whole thing but to just sit around and wait for time to take its course?  What i do get to do is spend time with my children.  Be grateful for the health of my family and time I have on this earth.  Even though I don't know how much time and with whom. I am grateful I have time.


Thursday, March 26, 2020

Mental Health

I am writing this post as I want my children to know that it was not easy being a mother.

Don't get me wrong being a mom is the purest joy of my life.  But after my 2nd pregnancy I went through hell internal and external.

2nd pregnancy was very difficult with a added Auto immune as a bonus.  Once the delivery happened, there were wonderful in law fights and hell.  Of course fights with the husband.  Own family members breaking my heart. The most happiest time in my life turned nightmare-ish.  Work sucked (lost direct reports in the mere fact that i was a returning mom to work)  Had to pretty much quit my job.  Earned planter factious, hip pain, shoulder pain.  Had to leave my beautiful home due to many fights fights fights...  Made a decision to stay as family for the sake of children.  Move across the coasts to restart life.  New jobs (2 already) to try to fit in and contribute.... Absolutely unfullfuilling job ever.

Some where along the way postpartum depression turned into "Adjustment Disorder"  I guess this is what my shrink calls it.  Having difficultly to cope with current life itself.  Depressive moods. Lack of interest.  Anxiety.  Lost energy in the core.  Absolutely zero career satisfaction. Aboslutely zero relationship satisfaction. Zero  interest in the materialistic life. Sadness.

Through out all this I am still your best mom.  You are still the best thing that happened to me.  This part of my life is fully fulfilled.  Its weird how two stories can coexist within me at the same time.

I am writing this to you because i want you to know, that it was VERY hard for your mom.  You are 7 and 3... you have bestest happiest life.  I am making sure of it while I am going through this.

Did I mention to you guys that there is the corona virus going around this time around the world and we are quarantined for 2 weeks now and possibly even more. So the world is also a bit of sad right now.

Here is a question Mahi you are asking me right now:  What kind of star wears sun glasses?  - Answer:  a movie star of course!  Krish you are sitting right next to me leaning in watching TV. 




36

Wow I have not blogged in for almost 6 years!  I need to write more I feel like looking back at my blog posts gives me a good perspective on what i have achieved in my life.

My number 1 and most important achievements are my children. Mahi and Krish

Thats my little 2 with my Mom.  Mahi is 7 and Krish is almost 3 (2 months away)  My Krishu is so naughty....  My Mahi is soo sweet.  They are with my mom.  Could I ask for more?  I treasure these 3.  The one that gave me life and the ones that i gave life to....  

Wednesday, February 26, 2014

30

3 decades.  I have lived for 3 decades...

I look back and the biggest achievements for me so far...

1.  I lived.  I was born and i survived to see 30 years.  This is a great achievement.  Life is very precious.
2.  I Graduated from University of Waterloo.  Which isn't just any university... It is one of the tops and not just graduated but worked hard and earned me way out with honors degree. 
3.  Relationships... with my parents, extended family and my husband (for 5 years)
4.  Bought and own my own car... Honda CRV 2009
5.  Got a Job, well 4 jobs... Computech, Thomson Reuters, Bank of America and now JP Morgan Chase.  Each job a step up the ladder for me.
6.  My biggest achievement:  Had a baby...   My BEAUTIFUL WONDERFUL Mahi.   To be honest this achievement beats all the above 5.  The most common achievement given by nature (no need to work that hard as above)  is the most rewarding gift. I look forward to the next decade and beyond to be a mom to this little girl.

What to look forward for the next decade:  is to live and let live... Another baby, a place that i can call home.  Some travel.. Europe, Singapore.  And most of all be a greatest mom in the whole wide world.

Tuesday, July 16, 2013

Motherhood

Lot has changed in the last 9 months.  Can't believe time is running so fast.  I have so many stories to tell about my little Mahi.

Apart from joy and happiness of motherhood, she bought clarity into my life.  I am more focused now.  I work hard to get things done and I am overall a better person than I was before her.

I am more forgiving and forgetting of people.  I have moved on from the past hurts.  My focus is on now, NOW with my daughter, my mom and my husband. 

These 3 people in my life are bring me enormous joy.  If I will every look back in the future,  I will remember that 2012-2013 is the happiest time of my life.  Thank you baba for this. 

Sunday, November 25, 2012

Introducing my daughter Mahi



My Mahi...

She changed my life forever.  My angel.  I am so blessed to be her mom.  Being a mom is privilage and a blessing.  I know it comes with lots of responsibilities.  But I feel like it is what I am supposed to do with my life.  I have a purpose for my life now.  To take care of this angel.

As a mom... My responsibilities are first to take care of her health (nurishment then hygine)  then her emotional health.. Make sure she is secure and happy.  Then my responsibility will be to help her mold her personality and lastly her education.  Help her be a successful person in this society. 

Mahi... if you ever read this please know that your mom loves you very much and you are a blessing in her life.  love
 

Goals Met so far


These were my goals this year:
1. Maybe baby
2. Pay off student loan
3. Help parents with their home building in India
4. Shamrock Shuffle
5. Fight for air
6. Maybe MBA Write GMAT.

I achieved a few of them

Paid off my student debt..  Fight for Air...  and of course the most important one BABY....

Forget Shamrock cause I was pregnant when it happened. :D 

So only 2 goals not achieved that I should have:
1.  Help parents with their home building in India
2.  Write GMAT..

Will transfer these to next here, pregnancy is not an easy thing to handle anyway

More on my baby later

Tuesday, April 24, 2012

Two Faces to the Coin

As Oprah says... I just had a aaaha movement. 

I had an Aaaha movement.  Everything in life happens for a reason.  A lesson i need to learn.  I have learned my lesson. 

You know the red flags that show up in life and you ignore them until they blow up in your face.  I saw the signs but never realized they were there until bam they hit me, and they knocked me down hard.  A person has two faces.  You see the glimpse of the dark side but you ignore it until you can't ignore it anymore. 

Another thing i learned is that it is ok not to be loved/understood by every body.  It is ok for relationships to end.  It is ok to distance myself from dysfunctional family.   It is ok to be content with my own life.


Saturday, February 11, 2012

The Spark

I'm most creative when...
I am under pressure. When I am challenged, I feel if anyone I can do this.

If I were a color, I would be...
Blue, deep as the deep blue sea. Lot of depth and wisdom.

I often imagine myself...
In a nice colorful floral dress, dancing

I really wish I know how to...
Swim. It would be nice to get over the fear.

I would love to spend a lazy sunday...
Staying home, sleeping in, relaxing watching tv, hanging out with hubby

My secret talent is...
Guessing the end of a movie within the first 20 minutes of the movie.

Wednesday, January 4, 2012

New Year - 2012

New Year, new life.

I am going to focus on me this year. Well me my parents and my brother and hubby. Pretty much all the people of my life.

Last year goals were well achieved...
1. paid off the car
2. paid credit card debt...
3. Save money to buy a house.

This year these are my new goals:
1. Maybe baby
2. Pay off student loan
3. Help parents with their home building in India
4. Shamrock Shuffle
5. Fight for air
6. Maybe MBA Write GMAT.

Time to focus on my future. And not dwell on the past. Past is past, can't seem to change it. Trust me i have tried. Esp. the people. Time to have some distance with everyone. Time to install some boundaries and close off doors.

Not too bad of goals right... Let's see what i will achieve this year....

Sunday, September 18, 2011

Turn of switch

It was lucky's 2nd birthday yesterday. I have realized that my life took another turn.

So far people have been nourishing me. I have been taken care of at parties or with parents or relatives. They made sure i was entertained and having fun. Now I have to do that for someone. I have to play the adult role. I am being called 'aunty.' I have to direct and make sure the kids are enjoying themselves. See to there needs. I miss being on the other side. But it's not bad being on this side. I quiet enjoyed myself - growing up. And it helps that all the kids liked me.

Does this mean that I am ready to be a parent. I know it's not an easy job. So many challenges, fears, etc. You require so much patients. It's a full time job. I see parent's who snap at their kids because they (parents) are not having a good day. I hope i won't be like that. I don't hope, i will try my best to be not like that.

Everyone at this party was wishing that I have kids. The priest blessed me to have twins. My mother-in-law dreamed that i have 2 chubby twin girls. The only person who now has to bless is my doctor. And God of course.

God please be kind and let me not loose my body. Help me loose my fear. Am I ready?

Wednesday, September 14, 2011

New day dreams...

I used to daydream about many things... Success at work, dream boy, marriage day. Now I am starting to dream of pregnancy.... Scary but maybe that means I am ready

Thursday, September 8, 2011

Relationships

From the moment we are born into this world we are lied to. The first lie comes from our mother. She promises to never hurt you and never let harm come near you. It is a silly promise because she will not be able to control life that is about to happen to this innocent child. This innocent child will grow up and not be so innocent anymore. He/She will break some hearts and make some promises he/she won't be able to keep and hence the cycle continue. We are truly alone, we are born alone and we die alone...

Human relations are so volatile. If it a java code, then it is not very thread safe. For a while it seems like the perfect code, bug free, and then you get stuck in a dead lock. Can't get out, no way out. The process needs to be killed Unless you end the relationship itself.

But is that the answer. When it gets tough do we end it.? Some relationships i have had shocked me. They shocked me because they began with a lie, a promise that eventually got broken. It not only ended the relationship, but it changed me forever. I was not the same person anymore. How could one event change me so much. I loved this person and thought she could do no harm but she did.

So I am stuck with one question. What do I do? couple of solutions
1. Ignore, pretend nothing happened - i don't think i could do that
2. Forgive and Forget - I can forgive, it is in me, but can i forget, it will never be the same
3. Leave the relationship - so easy choice. sounds right.

Here is another way to think about it.

1. Yes they have been there for me +20
2. Yes they have hurt me -10 (good seems to out weight the bad) BUT
3. Knowing what i know would i have felt the same way i felt before getting in too deep - NO, it is not worth it.

So when the bad weights the good out, why bother. End it. Finish it. Is it that simple?

My sketch of NTR.. Amature but tried!

Expansion or Stewardship

 I am taking a break from work and I am reading, watching and enjoying this time of break.  My most favorite thing to think about: 1. How th...